Whatever that is ideal, whatever that is fantasy, remains as it is. For what is ideal, lives far away from reality. And here I am, right smacked in reality, so much so that I wished I never returned. All these months praying for my parents… all futile. I know God is listening, but it seems like it just got worse. And yes, I only blog when I am deep in the pits. That means, I am in the pits. It’s too easy to walk away from all these. It’s too easy to fly back and never return. Maybe that’s what I should do. But escapism seems like something a coward would do. And I guess, God has His purpose for putting me wherever I am. And since I’m back “home” right now, I pray and ask for patience and love. I don’t know what I can do. I don’t know what’s the best thing to do either. Sometimes I feel like Paddy Clarke. Caught in between. And then, there’s church. Going back to my church, funny how I don’t exactly feel at home at all. I felt like I never left at all. Good or bad… I don’t know. But this church… it needs revival for sure.
Since my return, all that I’ve seen only points me to one fact: Everything and everyone needs God.
